The best place to look for a helping hand is at the end of your arm.
I don’t know who said it first but I’m saying it now!
Yesterday was chock full o’ challenges which offered a plethora of opportunities to test my resolve to act as opposed to react …. in many regards I did not fair well however I am encouraged by the fact that I can now recognize those less than stellar moments as opportunities to do better and not as proof that I am entirely beyond hope.
“We should see to it that whatever we have absorbed should not be allowed to remain unchanged, or it will be no part of us. We must digest it: otherwise it will merely enter the memory and not the reasoning power [in memoriam non in ingenium]. Let us loyally welcome such foods and make them our own, so that something that is one may be formed out of many elements, just as one number is formed of several elements.”
“Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a stalled ox and hatred therewith”
“It is far better to endure patiently a smart which nobody feels but yourself, than to commit a hasty action whose evil consequences will extend to all connected with you”
Excerpt From Jane Eyre
Charlotte Brontë & F.H. Townsend
Last night was a scramble of stop-motion vignettes loosely connected by the occasional familiar face. Nothing unusual in this other than the ability to read a written word or two, something that, as a rule, has been rather impossible but for perhaps less than a handful of occasions. In fact as a life long lucid dreamer, I have a few tricks up the old pajama sleeve that I use to verify my state (dream or awake) and one of them is to find the nearest periodical, street sign or wherever one might find a few words strung together, and determine if I can read them, generally if not, that is to say, if upon looking at them they become hazy or change form in some way, it is a clue that I’m asleep. Trouble with that is as I get older I often experience the similar in day to day attempts to read! So, these days I must verify by engaging in my other and most oft used technique which is to bend at the knees and thrust myself upward. In my dream state this will gently propel me skyward at which point I am free to fly wherever and at whatever velocity I choose and if awake I simply look the fool …. and I am good with either.
Perhaps more on this later …
I’m guessing it’s a far better thing to live and endure than to shadow in the bondage of pity.
As it has become abundantly clear that my ability to focus on any task at hand has become seriously compromised over the past decade or so, I have made a commitment that, upon entering my 56th year, I would try a little experiment :NO SOCIAL MEDIA FOR ONE YEAR.
I’ve tried before, several times, like many, posting long explanations of good bye and so long during which the sound of a million upward rolling eyes was nearly as deafening as the trumpets sounding my almost immediate return. And the mere fact that once hitting the deactivate account button I was almost immediately reduced to a cold sweat that could only be warmed by answering the demon call of the mouse begging to be clicked was really all the evidence I needed to know that I was a prisoner of yet another chemical reaction, one more powerful than my well known and often documented battle with alcohol! Oh dopamine, my beloved, how I crave your flashing perineum trembling glow!
I must say that the ride certainly hasn’t been ALL bad, at least in the short term. It is fact that I’ve been able to interact with people and become involved in projects that I never would have without things like Facebook (and before that Myspace). After all, it was Myspace that was largely responsible for getting record label representation after decades of sending tapes and letters to everyone and anyone whom I thought might be interested …. they weren’t. But herein lies the rub : much like a drunk who, every now and then, manages a night of drinking with little or no damage and uses these rare occasions to justify their “see? I have it all under control” mantra, it has been cleverly streamed (see what I did there?) into our consciousness that we actually NEED FB,IG and Twitter in order to stay current, especially those of us who use the platforms promote our businesses. Well I don’t know about you but I’ve noticed that the majority of my posts seem to only get a response from the same people, which I appreciate but what that tells me is that I’m spending an awful lot of time carpal tunnelling my way to an inability to play at all with minimal benefit. And if I’m being completely honest with myself, ten minutes posting about an upcoming show almost always turns into an easy block of hours chasing various rabbits down a plethora of time wasting holes. Indeed time better spent working on actual value adding concerns.
Also, I won’t go into it here, but there are a number of articles that detail in ways I never could the sinister control measures ol’ Zucky baby and his mad scientists are using to control our every impulse, each designed to turn a profit by making US the product.
Here’s one: Be a pioneer – delete Facebook
So, that brings me to where I am now. I suppose one could easily argue that this website is STILL a form of social media. And I suppose one would be right. But, at least to my way of thinking, it’s a lesser of many evils. And who knows? I might be back to the other stuff sooner than later, never say never, but for now my goal is at least a year and I’m rather excited to see the results of time spent engrossed in more productive pursuits.
Update: while I am not actively engaged in FB, IG or Twitter, there are settings on this webpage that automatically post to my FB Music Page and my @theduanerutter Twitter Page. This has been set up on the off-chance that someone might not have “received the memo” so to speak, and is interested in my current pursuits.
till next time:
be careful with your thoughts, keep a good mind and steer clear of bullshit